How can you tell if a man is just in it for the hookup, the sex, the booty call? Just ask him, right? Oh yeah, that works” HA. You’ll definitely get an honest answer there! Just like putting, “No Hookups” on a dating profile keeps the crazies away… right.

How do you read between the lines? Asking him directly is pointless. That’s just obnoxious and you’ll never get an honest answer. But on the second date or so, try asking him this

Look I’m not talking about the obvious lurkers and pervs who make innuendo or are blatant. I’m talking about…


You want to see if a guy is open, thoughtful and most importantly… can he articulate it.

Here is what I mean.

On the second or third date… casually ask him, “What was it that made you ask me out or want to spend time with me?”

Every guy in America and most industrialized nations will say one of two things. Both, however true they may be, are easy, default, low hanging answers that a trained monkey can say.

Something about “You are really pretty, hot, attractive… etc.”


“I thought we have a lot in common, would have a lot of fun, etc.”

Innocent and potentially true… but, they tell you nothing, they are pretty surface level and can apply to any human with ovaries. Nothing special or unique… but women accept it.

Every man will say that… count on it and don’t deduct points for it. Now is the follow up question to see what he’s got.

Say thank you, and that you aren’t fishing for a compliment, but what specifically did he see in you. what was it? You can ask it in a casual, flirty almost playful way… but what he says next will be telling.

Does it remain surface or physical… or does he mention something deeper… look I’m not talking about some soul taking.. but did he think about more than your jeans, etc…

Is it your energy, the peo… I saw how people treated her, responded to her when she was around and I

I said, I see how people smile when you’re around and I want to be around that.

Asking him “what was it about you that made him want to spend time with you”

Count on him saying something surface .. may be true.. but did he put more thought into it?

“You can tell a lot about a man by what he sees in you.”



Leave a comment below and tell me what you think or if you have a question you’d like one us to tackle on an upcoming FaceBook Q&A.


Bradley Richardson

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